


Falling Out of Hate

by MC_Fanfiction



Category: Batman - All Media Types, The LEGO Batman Movie (2017)
Genre: Alfred is a savage and therapist for Batman, Also Joker and Robin are cinnamon rolls, Batman is in denial, Fluff, M/M, Maybe angst, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Theres alot of things that im too lazy to tag, idk - Freeform, so enjoy, the world may never know
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2018-10-16 16:20:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10574985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MC_Fanfiction/pseuds/MC_Fanfiction
Summary: Batman and The Joker are now officially greatest enemies. But, as time goes on, their friends wonder if thats an accurate title for them to go by. Batman and The Joker think that as well.





	1. Exchanging and Thinking

**Author's Note:**

> I won't give that speech about how this is my first fic, that it might stink, or that you shouldn't criticize me hard, like Gordan Ramsey does with chef's. I would love criticism and feedback. If You don't want to read it, it's fine. I hope you enjoy it!

Batman would be lying if he said he wasn't thinking. But then again he wouldn't want to admit it either. Cause Batman doesn't do that. Unless he is thinking of one of his greatest plans. Other than that, he only thinks about rage and his cool songs.

There were a few things he was thinking about. First, he was thinking about the last 10-15 minutes, or so, he wasn't sure. He didn't keep up with the time, time kept up with him. Anyway, he was thinking about when Gotham city was about to split up. Luckily he used his sick mind and abs for that and saved the town. Which is is definitely all well and good for him.

But...

That made him think about the next big thing.

He saved the city with The Joker. And soon afterward told The Joker that he hated him. That scene kept on replaying in his head. It was making him angry. He didn't know why. He would have to let Alfred to remind him to hit something later.

He realized there was a muffled sound coming towards him, so he swung a kick in that area.

"Woah! Hey calm down Batsy it's just me!" Joker yelped, luckily dodging the kick, quickly catching his breath.

"OH jeez, sorry about that J-bird. I have incredible reflexes." Batman stated, checking to see if Joker was ok, which made him stop and wonder why he was doing that in the first place. But he didn't have time to think about that since Joker started to talk again.

"Well yeah I can see that," He said fixing his suit." I just wanted to see what you were doing, you've just been, ya know, staring out into space or something." 

"Oh, well I've just been, ya know, thinking about how awesome I was thinking about that idea with using our abs to save Gotham." Batman said, striking a pose, wishing that someone had a camera to take his picture.

Joker laughed and nodded, " Well, technically YOUR abs did, since I have a bit of flab." He said, poking his belly a bit, which Batman looked away once he did, for some reason. "All I did was pretty much hold hands with you."

Batman remembered that. He didn't want to but, he did. There was about five seconds of awkward scilence, which felt like a few minutes to Batman. Luckily, Joker started speaking again.

"Well, don't you worry my greatest enemy!" He said slapping his shoulder. "I'm going to get a sick six pack, so that way I help the city again if it splits in two!"

"Just a six pack?" Batman chuckled, while turning to face him, " Why don't you go for a nine pack, that way, you can crush everything in sight." He said, while flexing his abs.

Joker tried to ingnore him doing that and laugh, then shook his head.

"Nah, I think I'm good with just a six pack." He said, smiling and looking out at the sunset Batman was staring at earlier.

"Well, suit yourself, just remember to do those bench presses and weight lifting. Maybe if you're lucky I'll give you training tips."

"Really? Well, thank you Batsy!" He said, clearly overjoyed.

They stared at the sunset for a bit before Batman realized that the Joker was twiddling his thumbs. He looked like he wanted to say something, but didn't have the courage to. For some reason, Batman felt like he wanted to ask what was wrong, like it going to keep on bugging him if he didn't. Well... he already opened up to more people in his life, so what is it going to matter of he asked him what was up?

"Uh, hey J, what's up, you look like you want to say something."

"...Well, I just wanted to know if...uh," He said, looking down. It took him a minute to say what he wanted to say.

"If you wanted to trade phone numbers?" He asked looking up at Batman.

Batman mind went to some many questions. Why did Joker want to trade phone numbers? Why was he shy to ask that question? Why he was making these big eyes at him? Why was he focused on his eyes? All of those questions hit him like a brick. 

"Uhm.. any particular reason why?" He asked

"Well, we're greatest enemies now! So I figured that we should exchange numbers, just in case one of us gets sick or is busy and that we don't have time to fight," He stated, like he rehearsed it. " Or, just ya know, talk or something, since all greatest enemies have a strong bond!"

Batman was trying to comprehend what exactly Joker was saying. It all sounded like a foreign language to him.

"So... do you wanna exchange numbers?" Joker asked, holding out his phone.

Batman took a long look at the phone. He saw it was a little older model, around 2014, since Batman always got the newest and latest edition, he found it wierd. He notice that it also had a custom made case. Half of it was purple and green, while the other half was black and yellow. He notice that on the purple and green there was a red smile, staying particularly on the green side, which was on top of the purple, which that had a tie and collar design. Then he realizes that the black and yellow side had a utility belt design, as well as the Bat symbol. He also notice two blue lights on the Black side of the case, a little bit above the the Bat symbol on the case. He soon realized that he was looking at The Joker and The Batman.

"Well that's cute"

"What's cute?" The Joker asked.

"Gasped! How did he hear my thoughts?!"

"You're talking out loud Batsy, but, you still haven't answered my question."

"Oh... uhmmm..." Batman mumbled, looking away. For the first time he didn't know what to do. If course, he doesn't want anyone to know that. But he really didn't know what to do. For some reason he didn't want to object to the idea of exchanging numbers. But... well but nothing, he didn't want to say no Joker. He didn't know why. But...

But...

He looked back at the phone and back at the Joker. The Jokers face made his decision. He had one of the biggest and hopeful smile he had every seen the Joker do. He eyes were big and sparkling. Lastly, his eyebrows were make his face even more expressive than they should've been. He had no right to make that face.

"Alright Joker, give me your phone," He said, holding out his hand, while grabbing his phone from his pocket with the other.

"R-really?! YAY!" Joker said jumping with joy. He quickly handed Batman his phone and quickly snatched up Batman's phone. He was quickly typing his number, while Batman was typing in his into Jokers. Joker hand him his phone back while Batman did the same.

"Yeee! Now well be the bestest greatest enemies ever!" Joker stated, way to happy.

"Bestest isn't a word."

"Well it should be! I'm going to go now. See ya and or text ya later bestest greatest enemy!" He said, while skipping, giggling, and jumping away.

Batman looked down at his phone and saw Joker's number. Without realizing it, he made the contact name to " J-Bird." He then stared at it for a few more seconds, then left to go find where Robin had went.

\------------------

Joker looked back at Batman and saw him typed in something on his phone. Then after a few seconds he left. He wondered what he typed in then realized he had to give Batman a contact mane. He typed in " Batsy." He smiled to himself

"Hey Mr. J, Posion Ivy invited us to go to a movie at her house. Wanna go?"

Joker smiled. "Sure Girl-Buddy! Let's go!"

"I'm driving! Harley said, while jumping into the driver's seat. He jumped in the front seat beside her.

Joker decided to think about what just happened.

\--------------

"Hey! BatDad! I saw you had a big movie theater in our house, can we watch some Disney movies?" Robin asked, giving his big and vulnerable eyes a chance to show.

"Sure kid." Batman said, giving a small smile.

"Yay! Come on, our family's waiting!" He said running to Alfred and Barbara.

"Hey, Barbara, since we are teammates now, you can drive, I need time to...relax." Batman said, climbing in the front seat. Alfred had quickly added them, with the help of Robin and Barbara.

"Sure Batman." She said, climbing into the driver seat.

Batman decided to think about what just happened.

\---------------

Neither of them could believe the last 5 minutes.


	2. A Disney/Pixar Story?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This felt like an eternity to me, but it is finally here! Please note that there is spoilers for Wall-e, and please note that I dont know much about Poison Ivy so if her personality is incorrect I'm sorry.

"So, what movie we are going to watch?"Poison Ivy asked, inviting them inside.

"Well after a day like this, I like to kick back and watch a Disney movie, what do you think Sugar Plum?" Harley asked, while kicking off her rollerblades.

"Oh, well yeah actually I don't mind at all." Joker said, not really paying attention. He was looking at his phone, still couldn't believe the day he had. First, he heard Batman referred to them as "us", then got to hold hands with him and hear the three magic words come out of Batman's mouth: I hate you. Then he somehow got Batman's number. He couldn't be happier. 

"Well, I'm all down with a Disney movie, but whose going to pick it?" Ivy asked, looking through her Disney movie collection.

"Since it is practically Mr. J's day, why don't we let him pick?" Harley said from the kitchen. 

"Well, can't argue with that, so Jokes, what movie do you wanna watch?" Ivy asked, looking at him.

"Hmmm, oh oh, I wanna watch Wall-e!" Joker said, jumping with excitment and plopping down on the couch.

"Good idea Boo-Boo! Pop it in Ivy!" Harley said, carrying three cans of soda and three boxes of the leftover pizza from their last movie night. The pizza boxes looked like they had been burnt a bit recently.

"Harls you know that my babies are scared of fire." Ivy said, putting in the movie and petting one of her plants.

"Don't worry, I made sure to have the fire on the lowest heat, and I made sure to move them out of the kitchen, your smallest is right there on the table." Harls said, pointing at the table. For the plant being the smallest, it was as big as a grown up human.

"Oh, thank you for doing that Harls."

Harley blushed a bit. " Ah, don't worry about it, now let's just chill for a bit, we've earned it, especially you Mr. J."

The played the movie and started watching it, which usually consisted of Ivy get to upset on the Earth being damaged and dead.

"How could anyone let this happen to Earth, it just makes me sick."

"See, this is why I describe you as Wall-e since you find plant life and help out the Earth!" Harls said, Patting her shoulder. "Well, yeah I guess, and you're a lot like Eva, since you're so pretty and kick butt." Ivy said, smiling and blushing. 

At this point, the Joker would be thinking about how Harley and Ivy should just get together already and think how cute they would be together, but right now, his mind was lost. He thought about how he held hands with Batman. Even though he was wearing gloves, he could tell that his hand were almost always warm. He wondered what he looked like underneath the cowl, when he saw that his favorite part of the movie came up.

It was showing Wall-e on how he was watching a movie with a couple holding hands, then he learned how to hold hands as well. Joker didn't realized it, but once he looked down, he saw that his hands mimicked what Wall-e was doing and had them intertwined. He smiled then went back to watching the movie. He would have to think of an excuse to hold Batman's hand later.

\-------------

"So, BatDad, which Disney movie do you wanna watch?" Dick asked, placing his bag near him and looking through it.

"It doesn't really matter to me, since I haven't seen any at all." Batman said. He was to busy putting this days on the top ten weirdest days he ever had.

But he didn't have a chance to finish his thought, because he heard Dick gasping.

"Well, don't you worry BatDad, I will pick my most favorite Disney movie, and I promise you, you will NOT be disappointed!" He said, reaching into his bag.

Batman sighed and decided to let Dick do his thing. After all, he almost lost his new father, so he didn't mind. In fact, he deserved some quality time with him. Dick soon jumped right next to Batman and sat down with a bag of popcorn.

"This movie is called Wall-e, I won't spoil it, but It's really good! It always gets me teary eyed at the end. I hope you enjoy it!" Dick said, with his all too big smile and eyes.

It suddenly hit Batman when he realized that he gave the Joker his phone number. At first he didn't know why it had taken him that long to realize, but then he noticed another thing. He notice that he didn't really care that he gave Joker his phone number. He wasn't even angry. And he honestly didn't know why. He decided to clear it from his thoughts and focus on the movie.

It was starting, and to be honest, he really was enjoying the movie. He liked the idea that Earth was dying and that there was one robot cleaning it up. He then watch a scene where the main character, Wall-e he guessed, mimicked a couple on his TV. He mimicked them holding hands. He was questioning why and how Wall-e was having emotions, since he was a robot, when Dick started speaking again.

"Hey, that's just like what you and Joker did!" He said, pointing at the screen.

If Batman had some water, he would spit out right now, but all he had was popcorn, and he didn't want to ruin the carpet.

"Uhh, we did what?"

"You guys held hands!"

"What? Pshh, no we didn't."

"Yeah you did, it's what help saved the city."

"No, our abs helped the city."

"That may be true, but one of the steps was to hold hands pretty much. If you didn't have anything to hold on to, you wouldn't been able to use your abs."

He couldn't believe what Dick was saying to him. But at that point Batman couldn't argue with him, since, as much as he hated to admit it, he was right. Holding hands was one of the steps, but only just a small portion of it.He suddenly remember that moment and remember the feeling of Joker's hands. Even though Batman didn't feel them with his skin, he could tell that they were a bit cold, but for some reason he.... didn't mind that the Joker' s hands were naturally cold. He grunted and sat back down. Dick giggled a bit, since he knew that he had won the argument. For some reason, Batman got the feeling to looked down, so he did. He saw that he had his hands intertwined. He thought of it as nothing, but a part of him felt liked he mimicked Wall-e.

He tried to forget about it and just watch the movie.

\-----------

Batman and Dick came out of the movie theater when Alfred greeted them.

"Hello Master Dick and Master Bruce, what did you two just finished watching?" Alfred asked

"I showed him Wall-e since he's never seen it before! He said he enjoyed it, right BatDad?" Dick asked, looking at him with his big old eyes.

"Uh, yeah actually, I did." He said, looking down at his hands.

"Hmmm, well, I'm glad you two enjoyed yourselves. Now you two should get some rest." Alfred said, clearly seeing that Batman was about to get lost in thought.

"Huh, oh yeah, night Alfred, might Dick" He said, going to his room.

"Night BatDad!" Dick said.

There was no way that Batman was going to sleep with all of his thoughts in his head.

"Is it just me Master Dick, but does Master Bruce seem much more, lost in thought than he usually is?" Alfred asked.

"Yeah, that's probably because I won an argument about how he had to held the Jokers hand to save the city." Dick said. "Well I'm going to bed now, goodnight Grandpa!" 

Alfred chuckled."Good night Master Dick." He left and wondered what he was going to do about Bruce.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need some sleep now, ill try to post a chapter on the weekend. Also thank you so much for the nice comments on the first chapter! I hope you enjoyed this one! Its smaller then i had hoped but im happy!


	3. A not so Dark Knight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't wait to post the next chapter. I might even do daily post if i have at least a good idea on what my next chapter could be. But, ya never know. Please enjoy!

"That movie always gets to me." Poison Ivy said, grabbing a tissue.

"Well, if it didn't, then you don't have a heart, and I-well, WE both know that you do have on of the biggest hearts ever!" Harley said, giving her a side hug.

"Thanks Harls, I mean, the ending is so cute, on how they get together and practically save Earth! And people say robots can't fall in love." Ivy said, shutting of the movie.

Joker loved listening to them ramble, they were just so cute together. He then wondered if Batman would ever like these types of movies. I mean, he likes romantic comedies, and the movie does seem a bit like a romantic comedy. He would have to ask him later.

"Hey, Boo-boo, what were you and Batman talking about earlier? I meant to bring it up to you in the car, but you seemed lost in space."

"Oh Harls you will NOT believe this, but Batsy and I exchanged phone numbers!" Joker said squealing with joy.

Harley smiled and Ivy clapped for him.

"That's such good news Boo-boo! This is a night you defiantly deserve."

"Well, have you texted him yet?"

"Well, I wasn't sure I should." Joker said, glancing at his phone. " I didn't want to seem cligny but I didnt want to seem like a butt and not text him. I don't know what to do."

"Well Mr. J, it's something that you don't have to rush into, you can text him whenever you want. I personally don't think it matters if you seem clingy, since you kind of already are."

"Yeah, and if he's annoyed by your texting, then tell him too bad. " 

"... Well, I'll take your advice, but right now I just wanna go him and go to bed." Joker said, while standing up.

"Of course Boo-boo, anyway thanks for inviting us Ivy! Harley said, while putting on her rollerblades and giving Ivy a big hug.

"Of course Harls, please come back soon!" Ivy said, hugging her back.

The Joker and Harley got into there car and went home. Part of Joker just wanted to sleep and have a wonderful dream about today, but a part of him wanted to text Batman. Once they got home, he stripped down into his pajamas, which was pretty much Batman merchandise. He laid down on his bed and sat his phone beside him. He wasn't that tired, so he thought about texting Batman.

\--------------

He didn't even know why he went to bed this early. It was only around 7 p.m and he went to bed. Something was clearly up, usually he would just work out the night away and eat Lobster Thermidor, and occasionally write a song. He just laid down in his bed and stared at his boring ceiling. He looked over at his phone, and remembered that he and The Joker exchanged numbers. Which also made him remember what Dick said earlier, how they held hands.

The movie that Dick showed was actually pretty good. Though once he made the connection to Joker and Batman holding hands to Wall-e and Eva holding hands, it freaked out Batman a bit. Other then that, it was good. He looked back at the ceiling for a bit, sighed, and grabbed his phone.

He couldn't believe he was doing this.

\------------

"Batsy" 7:08 p.m: Hey Jokes my man what's going on?  
"J-Bird" 7:09 p.m: Oh, hey Batsy! Nothing much, I was just about to head to bed. Heh, hey that rhymes :D.  
"Batsy" 7:10 p.m: Oh, sorry J, should I talk to you later?  
"J-Bird" 7:11 p.m: Nah it's good, I'm pretty good at staying up late, since afterall, I am the, "Clown Prince of Crime."  
"Batsy" 7:12 p.m: If you're challenging the "Dark Knight" to a contest of, "who can stay up the longest." Then I accept.  
"J-Bird" 7:13 p.m: Nah, I think I'm good :P.

\------------  
"J-Bird" 9:30 p.m: Do you seriously stick to a diet of just Lobster Thermidor?  
"Batsy" 9:31p.m: Well yeah, it's pretty healthy, how else do you think I have nine pack?  
"J-Bird" 9:32 p.m: Uhm? By working out? Is that really all you've eaten for the past years?  
"Batsy" 9:33 p.m: Yeah J, and it's been working like a charm.  
"J-Bird"9:34 p.m: And you say I'm weird, haha!

\-----------  
"J-Bird" 10:45 p.m: Well, as much as I love to continue our conversation, I need my beauty sleep.  
"Batsy" 10:46 p.m: Don't see why YOU would need it but, yeah I need mine too.  
"J-Bird" 10:47 p.m: Uh, Batsy, do you wanna hang out tomorrow by any chance?  
"Batsy" 10:50 p.m: What the heck, I don't have much to do tomorrow, so why not?  
"J-Bird" 10:51 p.m: YAY! Well, see ya tommorow Batsy! Goodnight!  
"Batsy" 10:52 p.m: Yeah, goodnight J-Bird.

\-----------

For it being dark in Batman's room, it didn't seem like all darkness to him. He wasn't going to complain.

\--------------

Joker is defiantly having the best day of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things getting good. Though I have to learn to when I should post my chapters so I can get some sleep.


	4. Food For Thought

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess whose back from the dead. I finally figured out what the chapter would be. Well sort of, I usually just think about the central idea and write from there. So I hope you enjoy my improve writing.

Even though Batman never sleeps, and is always and constantly working, whether it's his nine pack, or the crime in Gotham City, this particular sleepless night bothered him. He of course tried different ways of putting himself to sleep. He grabbed one of Alfred Butler books and read the whole thing just to make him bored. He tried working out just to make him tired. He then tried to watch an entire documentary on the history of penguins, run by Oswald Cobblepot, Batman didn't even bother to know how he got to host it.

After all of that, Batman still couldnt get to sleep. All he got out of it was a smelly robe, knowledge on how to set a table up properly and correctly, and tips on how to save penguins in any given situation. The later it got the more annoyed he got. He sat down by his big and gorgeous fireplace, trying to think of any other possible way to get to sleep.

"I know, I'll just heat up some Lobster Thermidor! It hasn't failed me yet." He said, going into the kitchen.

He grabbed some out of the fridge and put it in the microwave. He didn't really think about anything for two minutes, or at least tried to, when he heard footsteps.

"Whose there?" Batman stated, while kicking in the general direction of the noise.

"Calm down sir it's just me." Alfred said, luckily a few feet away from the kick.

"Oh, hey Alfred, what are doing up"

"I was honestly going to ask you the same thing, but then I remembered that you're Batman."

Alfred looked over at the microwave, then at Batman.

"You're eating Lobster Thermidor?"

"Yeah, duuh, why wouldn't I?"

"It's three in the morning sir."

"So? That doesn't stop me from eating it." He said, grabbing it from the microwave and when into the living room.

"Oh by the way, you should probably start getting the mansion all cleaned up, and make sure any possible entries of the Batcave is unreachable." He said, sitting down.

"Oh, and why is that sir? It's so early to do so and Master Dick is still sleep in and I don't want to wake him up."

"Well because Joker is stopping by and I don't want the place to look like a wreak. That and I don't want him find another way into the Batcave." He said, taking a bit bite out of his food.

Alfred didn't really looked shocked to hear this, but it was something new in his ears.

"You've, invite The Joker over here?" Alfred asked, sitting down.

"Well, technically he asked to come over and I said yes, but yeah." He said, with a mouth full of Lobster in his mouth.

Alfred made a look of puzzlement, then it slowly turned into one that Batman knew all to well, and had grown to hate over the years. It was a very smug look, as if he found out a big secret.

"Well, what are you two going to do?"

"You know, whatever greatest enemies do, practice fighting, make certain plans for fights, maybe I'll give him some fighting tips, I don't know." He said, taking another big bite of his food.

"Are you going to do the thing from Wall-e?! You know, hold hands and kiss finally? Dick said, jumping with hope.

Batman spat out his Lobster Thermidor and jumped from his seat. He looked up at the stair case and saw Dick standing there with the biggest smile known to man, well, besides The Joker's.

"Dick, first off, don't shout in foreign languages in my home, secondly, how long were you standing there, and thirdly, why are you up?!"

"Padre, first off, you said it was okay, and even good for me to speak another language, secondly, since you and Grandpa started talking, and thirdly, I had to use the bathroom but I couldn't find it, so I woke up Grandpa and asked where it was."

"Well, whatever you said in the foreign language, the answer is no. Now please, get back to bed it's late."

"Yay, I've been parented once again!" He said, grabbing his blanket and running off.

"Please be careful Master Dick when running in the halls, you could hurt yourself." Alfred said, calling after him.

"Don't worry Grandpa!" He shouted.

"Oh, jeez, sorry Alfred, I spat out my Lobster Thermidor on the ground." He said, looking down.

"It's alright Master Bruce, after all, I need to get the house ready for Jokers arrival, but for now, please get some sleep."

"Right. Sleep. I'll get on that. Night Alfred." He said, going up the stairs.

Alfred got a dust sweeper and a mop for the mess Batman made. He sighed, but chuckled at the same time. After The Joker is done visting, he's definitely going to have to talk to Batman about his...other types of feelings, whether he wanted to or not.

\------------------

Joker was too excited and very anxious to sleep. He couldn't believe the stroke of luck he was get with Batsy. It's almost as if it wasn't even him. Maybe he turned over a new leaf, or was feeling really off all week, either way, he didn't care.

Joker was pacing around wondering what he should wear. He didn't know if his regular clothes sufficed or if this called for the fancier of clothes or if he should just casual. Either way it was stressing him out. This defiantly called for the best of the best out of all of the fashionistas he has met. He went into Harley's room to wake her up.

"Harls. Harls. Harls wake up this is a dress code emergency."

As soon as he said, "dress code emergency", Harley quickly woke up as if her life depended on it.

"What, who, why, and where is the dress code emergency?" Harley asked, putting on her light. 

"Well, don't laugh or yell at me but, it's about what I'm going to wear when I go over to Batman's place." Joker said, looking down.

Harley just smiled, knowing that the world, and herself, didn't deserved such a pure cinnamon roll.

"Sweetheart, I know for a fact that outstanding in any outfit you're in. But if it will make you feel better, I'll help ya out." Harley said, rubbing his hair. "But first, I wanna eat some ice cream, how about you Mr. J?"

"That sounds delightful Harley! Let's go down to the ice cream parlor, since they're open 24 hours a day."

"Alrighty then, let's go. Let's at least get dressed first though."

\--------------

They both walked into the ice cream parlor, not having to worry about people since it was three in the morning. Joker went up to the counter and started pressing the bell to get a worker out.

"Seriously workers?! You are open twenty four seven, why are you guys not out here?!" Joker said, pressing the bell faster, practically slamming it.

A worker finally walked out of the back room. They looked like some small child that just got lost. They stopped and just stared at Joker and Harley.

"....Usually I have to be sleep deprived to see something like this." The worker said.

"What took you so long, shouldn't you be out here on gaurd duty or something and be serving people?!" Joker said, practically climbing over the table.

"Well excuse me green apple with lipstick, I am merely a child, and a small one at that, so please mind my short legs."

"I'm just surprise that they aren't calling the cops." Harley said, putting down her hammer.

"Trust me, I've seen wierder, alrighty, what do you want?"

"Oh oh! I wanna have a big chocolate and strawberry sundae! With sprinkles! And chocolate and strawberry syrup!" Joker said.

"And I want vanilla and strawberry sundae, with chocolate syrup, whip cream and a cherry on top." 

"Okie dokie then. I have a very big feeling that you are not going to pay for this so I'll make it free, just don't make a mess."

"Yeppie!" Joker exclaimed, jumping into a booth, with Harley joining him.

"Gosh, my boss is gonna kill me." The worker said, going to the back.

"Now, Boo-Boo, I gotta ask, why are you so worried about what you look like in front of Batman?" Harley said, resting her elbows on the table.

"Well because we are officially greatest enemies, and I don't want to look silly, especially when it's the first time in the 78 years that we've know eachother that he is actually allowing me to come over. So I don't wanna look like a big slob." Joker said, slouching a bit.

"First off boo, don't sit like that, you'll ruin your back. Secondly, if you known eachother for 78 years, then he won't care what you dress in. And If he does, I'll fight him."

"Funny, this conversation sounds so familiar, only it's me saying that sentence and you worrying over about Ivy."

Harley started to immediately blush and but on a childishly annoyed face to hide it.

"Seriously Harls, I know for a fact that Ivy likes you too, just ask her out."

"Sugar, it's not that easy, if it was, I would." She said, crossing her arms.

"Okay, how about this, if you get the courage and ask out Ivy within a week and a half, I will do anything you want."

"Hmm, anything?"

"Yes."

"Alrighty, that a deal for me!"

"Good Harls. Now, for gosh sakes where is our ice cream?!" Joker said, shouting at the top of his lungs.

\----

After they left and the worker put that moment on this top ten weirdest days ever, Joker and Harley went home and went to bed.

\---------

Neither Batman nor Joker could wait for the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I had fun writing this chapter and I wanted to continue this but I didn't want have this long and have you guys suffer with having to read. Anyway, I don't know when this series will end, and I dont know how much I'll have time too, since right now I need to focus on my grades since it's the end of the school year soon. And if I do have time, it will be only short chapters. I have ideas one shot ideas that I can do in the mean time. Or if you want me to just focus on this one until it's done, then let me know down in the comments.


	5. One Big Riddle

Alfred had delt with a lot of things over the years he has lived with both Bruce Wayne and The Batman. There are times where he thinks he's figured both of them out, but of course there's always that one surprise that either Bruce Wayne or The Batman have up their sleeve. Even though this wasn't the... weirdest things he's witness over the years, it would certainly go one the list.

But regardless he still did what, in this case, The Batman, asked for. Alfred made sure the house was in perfect condition for The Joker's arrival, with the help of Dick of course. Dick was actually pretty excited to have The Joker over. Alfred couldn't understand why, but seeing Dick happy was a nice sight, even on the weirdest day. Then, after they clean up the house, they both made food that was up to par with The Batman's standards. And yes, Lobster Thermidor was included.

"Alright Master Dick, I think we've done everything, you can do whatever you want now." Alfred said, while making sure the entrances to The Batcave were blocked off. He didn't understand why, considering The Joker's been inside it before.

"Grandpa, why do you think BatDad invited Mr. Joker over?" Dick asked.

"Not even I could answer that, Master Dick,I don't even think Master Bruce himself has figured out the reason." Alfred said, sealing off the last entrance.

Dick didn't look satisfied with that answer, but he knew it was the only answer he was going to get for the time being. So with that, Dick was about to skip off, but stopped.

"Do you think I should be in my costume?" He asked, looking slightly worried.

"Not to rain on your parade Master Dick, but it can be very easy to tell who you are, regardless if you were to wear your costume or not, you know, consider you're the only child sidekick that Batman has." Alfred said.

Dick looked slightly sad for a split second, but quickly recovered when he thought about it, seeing how logical it was.

"Well, yeah I see your point there, grandpa. Do you think BatDad will be fine with me being in regular clothes?" 

"I'm sure."

"Okie Dokie! I'll go get ready!" Dick exclaimed, running off to his room.

"Alright Master Dick." Alfred said, smiling to himself. He wonder how Dick was the sweetest and genuine child he had ever met.

Alfred went up to tell Bruce he was all done fixing up the whole mansion. He knocked on the door a few times before Bruce said for him to come in.

"Master Bruce I'm done with all the preparations for The Joker's arrival."

"Huh? Oh good. That's good. Yep." Bruce said. He focus was clearly on his phone.

"Oh and by the way Master Dick is just going to wear normal clothing, and I suggest you do the same, but keeping your cowl on of course."

"Uhm, but what if Joker decides that he's just going to attack us, or he plans to ambush us. I'm going to wear my suit." He said, finally looking up from his phone.

"First off, you invited him over, so I don't see any reason why he would. Secondly, why would he ambush us, to get into the Batcave?" Alfred asked.

"Besides, this isn't some battle you guys planned out, this is just a normal get together, so you can be casual Master Bruce, I'm sure he'll be casual too. In fact, you can tell him it's gonna be casual, to make things easier." Alfed said.

Bruce just looked at his closet. It had been a long time since he dressed in casual clothing, and he would still wear his cowl. So it wouldn't be like his identity would be revealed. But it seemed just, out of place for him do be in normal clothing. 

"I would at least like it if you considered being casual for one day. And it would probably make Master Dick happy as well." Alfred said, getting Batman's cowl out for him to wear, then leaving his room.

Oh great, Alfed pulled the, "This will make your family happy" card. And by gosh, seeing Dick sad would definitely pull at Bruce's heart-strings.

Well, it was just for one day, couldn't hurt right?

After searching through his closet, he found something that seemed to keep his essence, which was a yellow t-shirt, a black leather jacket, black skinny jeans, and black boots.

It was certainly.... refreshing... to wear something different.

\----------

"Harley! Girl-Buddy!" Joker shouted, in a almost whining tone.

"Mr. J I'm right here, what's wrong boo-boo?" Harley asked, skating up to Joker.

"So Batsy just said that I could just dress up casually, but like, what does "casual" mean to him? Does he mean business-casual, casual-casual, fighting-casual, or does casual mean business to him, or like what does it-"

"Boo-boo," Harley said, putting her hand into Joker's mouth.

"Breathe, you'll end up passing out of you talk this fast. I'm certain that he means to dress up casual." She said, while letting go of Joker's mouth. He then just breathed in and out, trying to compose himself.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"Probably? Mr. J I'm always right."

"Yeah yeah okay Harls. Can you at least help me find something that's a good kind of casual?"

"Of course, that's why I'm here."

After a quick montage of Joker trying on a bunch of different clothes, he settled with a orange/yellowish collared shirt, a purple hoodie, purple skinny jeans, and Batman tennis shoes. Yes he has Batman tennis shoes, but in his defense, every super villain should have something that shows off their counterparts symbol and or trademark.

"So Harls, how do I look?" He said, striking a pose, so dramatic that it could go on a reality TV show.

"You look stunning as always." She said, giving him a power hug. 

"Thanks Girl-Buddy. Oh, by the way, should I bring flowers? You know, since this is the first official day of us being greatest enemies and all that stuff." Joker asked, grabbing his car keys.

"Well, it certainly wouldn't hurt to bring some." She said, going down that stairs with him. 

"Okay then- wait, do you think there such things as black flowers?" Joker asked, one foot out the door.

"Mister J, I'm sure he'll appreciate any kind." She said, reassuring him.

"Okay okay Harls, well, see you later!" He said, exiting the building.

Harley just laughed to herself and say down to join everyone in the living room.

"Uhh, where's Joker at, shouldn't we be having an meeting right about now?" Killer Croc asked looking around.

"Oh, Mr. J is hanging out with Batman today."

Everyone just stopped what they were doing and just looked at her. Like she just said something in a foreign language that they didn't understand.

"... But didn't i hear something about bringing flowers?" Riddler asked

"He's bringing flowers for Batman."

Again, they just stared at her like she said something foreign.

"Hmmm...." Riddler pondered for a bit before standing in his chair.

"Riddle me this everyone, when is the perfect time to bring flowers to somebody?!"

"Ed, this doesn't sound like a riddle, it's sound like something a teacher would ask." Penguin said, feeding his penguins. 

"That's because I'm pretty much asking a rhetorical question Oz," He said, jumping off his chair, pacing around."You bring someone flowers, if they either, lost a friend/family member, if they just got a new job/promotion, if they are a new neighbor, if they are sick, if it's mother/fathers day, if it's and anniversary of some kind, or....." He said, slowly turning to everyone in a dramatic way.

".....If it's the first date." 

*Dramatic music plays*

"Alright, who just played that?" Harley asked. 

"Well excuse me I just flipped the coin and it landed on heads, which was to help out Riddler's case." Two-Face said, turning of the stereo.

"I mean, come on, even some who can't figure out two plus two could easily know this." Riddler said, sitting back down.

"You guys are like second graders, he just going to hang out with him." Harley said.

"Oh come on Harley! You know it too! In fact, Harvey, flip a coin to see whose right." He said, painting at Two-Face.

"But I usually flip it when I'M making a decision, not when someone else is."

"It's only one time Harvey!"

"Hmmm... heads for listen to Riddler just this one time or tails for-

"Don't make a decision for the decision! You know what, I'll do it!" Riddler shouted, grabbing the coin from Two-Face.

"Hey, I'll get you for that if the coin says I can!"

"Okay. Heads for Jokers on a date with Batman. Tails if it's just, quote unquote casual." Riddler said, flipping the coin into the air. Then soon he caught it.

"Oh what do you know, it said "Heads" see, even the coin is on my side."

"That's just coincidence, besides, I don't think Mr. J would approve of this." Harley said, while getting up from the couch.

"That's because he would know that I am right." Riddler said.

Two- Face flipped the coin, then growled.

"You're lucky Ed, the coins said that I shouldn't beat you up." 

"Well, it looks like the odds are in my favor today. As they should be."

"Yeah yeah whatever Ed. I'm going back to bed." Harley said, leaving the room.

Riddler sat back down and they continued to watch TV in silence for a bit. Until Penguin spoke.

"Do you think Batman considers it a date?" He asked.

"...Hmph. Now that is a good riddle." Riddler said, switching through the channels.

\---------

It's one everyone would ask that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess whose back! I am so sorry. It has really been a long time since I've upload a chapter of this. I've wanted to write some this summer but part of me was saying, "ehh maybe I should stop." And you know all of the writers block things came up, along with other stuff. But now it's school time and I've gather some inspiration and what not so YEAH! It is very possible that later tonight I'll upload another chapter, and if I don't, it's might be here tomorrow. But you all can expect more! I am glad to be back!


	6. Not a chapter update just author note (pretty important)

Ooohhhh boy. Wow. Uh hey it's been so long a whole freaking year went by since adding anything to this. So yeah I remember not to long after making the last chapter I was in the middle of writing and it would not save, cause my phone is dumb like that, and everytime I tried to, it would just act up. So because of it I stopped writing and soon, I got the dreaded writers block. Even though I always intended to finish this, life just kinda but me like a brick in a bad way and I just lost interest and forgot about this.

So I kinda thought eh I highly doubt anyone is still waiting for a chapter, but I got curious and checked what people said and i saw comments from this year, which pumped me up. Yea this year its definitely gonna be a year where I need to get my mindset into being an adult, but I wanna finish this and maybe start on other ones, maybe not Batjokes but somethin.

Anyway. I can't promise a new chapter will be out soon, but I'm gonna do my best to get back into the groove of being a Lego Batjokes shipper. I might have to re-write some chapters because honestly I was writing on a whim with a vague idea, which, pro-trip never do. So I'll be sure to put that in new notes for new readers, or old ones to see in the first 5 chapters.

So, I'll see ya guys when I can! If you're still here from the last year, then thank you, that means alot to me. And if you're new, I hope you enjoyed what you've seen so far. But to everyone in general, that's for giving my story a read.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm pretty proud about how this turns out! I will try to update this as much as I can! Feedback, comments, and kudos are always appreciated.


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